Follow-up on Date night

 I earlier wrote about my date nights with my husband.   I wanted to explain why we started our date nights.  We had been married about 8 or 9 years and had been fighting ALOT!  We would fight over nothing and everything.  I needed his help more and he felt he could not give more help.....or we fought over how we disciplined the kids or how he drove (which we still do).  So, instead of just starting fights throughout the week we would write down on a piece of paper why were angry or frustrated with that person.  Then when we went on date night we discussed those topics to see if we could come to an understanding or compromise.  This worked really well because then the heat of the moment was no longer there and sometimes we could see how silly or petty we were being with each other.   It has worked very well and our date nights are less about those topics and more about us just being out together for dinner or whatever.  I can truly say we were on our way to a divorce if we had not done something.  We wanted a more peaceful home for the kids and did not want them to see us act this way.  I did not want my kids to have relationships where there was arguing so we thought that we had better stop it quick!!  This was what we tried first and it has worked for us.  We have also become more of a "team" when dealing with the kids instead of getting pulled in different directions.  Now when the kids ask about something we say that we will talk to each other about it on date night and then let them know our answer.  So, if you are frustrated and are looking for something to try....this could be it.  Everyone has issues and frustrations but we tend to take it out on the person closest to us and that is normally our spouse.  Try date night!!  See if the communication gets better and don't let the kids overtake your week with activities that get in the way of date night, otherwise, you are back to square one.